Feedback on Rough Cut
I have a mix of audio and written feedback from showing others my rough cut, the audio is held in the video, and the written feedback is below it.
Feedback 3:
"General feedback lovely how you have animated a very difficult period of time for the older generation in a sympathetic and gentle way to remind us all of the terrible times people went through but that it was everyday normality at that time. Colour palette very good and gentle on the eyes. Loved how in chapter 3 you had the young children next to the blurred lines of the vehicles effective, perhaps you could have an arrow/arrows running past them to heighten how long they all had to wait for the convoys. Really liked how you decreased the number of children being picked in the waiting area-effective in how awful it must have been, sorry jumped back to chapter 1. Also liked how you had a picture of her Dad that you animated over the top very clear. Can understand the blanks perhaps a big question mark as to them not knowing if they were going to get hit by a bomb or not."
Feedback 4:
"I think it work very well. Loved the subject matter and the animation added to the story and didn't distract from it. Only bits I thought you might change are in the evacuation section- The scene in the hall looks outside rather than in. Would putting up a church banner, WW2 poster or a window make it appear like an interior scene?- You've got about 9 seconds at the end of that scene where she's just talking over the title of the next section. Could you add a homecoming scene here (child runs into arms or if that's too cliché, misses mum's arms and goes for cuddly toy/dog?)"
Feedback 5:
"1 Think it would work well in educating young people about older people's experiences, the war, growing up etc.
2 It moves at quite a pace (mainly because of the narrator's speed of talking), is there any way of editing it, so it slows down/ chunks a bit?
3 There were a couple of occasions when the screen blanked completely although the narrator was still speaking.
4 Could you put gaps between the chapters maybe so that her words don't overlap with the next chapter title? Again, it's the speed of the narrator's speech!!
5 It was great to see the real photos...it helped the audience to engage with the characters.
Parts that I found particularly effective and moving were:
* "we were chosen"/had to wait to be chosen
* "left to last"
* the use of shadows to show planes...was sinister
* the bombing and use of underground -all this is so moving because it's stayed in her mind all these years.
And you highlighted these moments by selecting the words and putting them on the screen or by the animation"
Feedback 3:
"General feedback lovely how you have animated a very difficult period of time for the older generation in a sympathetic and gentle way to remind us all of the terrible times people went through but that it was everyday normality at that time. Colour palette very good and gentle on the eyes. Loved how in chapter 3 you had the young children next to the blurred lines of the vehicles effective, perhaps you could have an arrow/arrows running past them to heighten how long they all had to wait for the convoys. Really liked how you decreased the number of children being picked in the waiting area-effective in how awful it must have been, sorry jumped back to chapter 1. Also liked how you had a picture of her Dad that you animated over the top very clear. Can understand the blanks perhaps a big question mark as to them not knowing if they were going to get hit by a bomb or not."
Feedback 4:
"I think it work very well. Loved the subject matter and the animation added to the story and didn't distract from it. Only bits I thought you might change are in the evacuation section- The scene in the hall looks outside rather than in. Would putting up a church banner, WW2 poster or a window make it appear like an interior scene?- You've got about 9 seconds at the end of that scene where she's just talking over the title of the next section. Could you add a homecoming scene here (child runs into arms or if that's too cliché, misses mum's arms and goes for cuddly toy/dog?)"
Feedback 5:
"1 Think it would work well in educating young people about older people's experiences, the war, growing up etc.
2 It moves at quite a pace (mainly because of the narrator's speed of talking), is there any way of editing it, so it slows down/ chunks a bit?
3 There were a couple of occasions when the screen blanked completely although the narrator was still speaking.
4 Could you put gaps between the chapters maybe so that her words don't overlap with the next chapter title? Again, it's the speed of the narrator's speech!!
5 It was great to see the real photos...it helped the audience to engage with the characters.
Parts that I found particularly effective and moving were:
* "we were chosen"/had to wait to be chosen
* "left to last"
* the use of shadows to show planes...was sinister
* the bombing and use of underground -all this is so moving because it's stayed in her mind all these years.
And you highlighted these moments by selecting the words and putting them on the screen or by the animation"
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